Being Thankful Day Two: Marriage Equality

               Friday June 26, 2015 will be a day that many in the LGBT+ community will always remember, it is the day that we got the right to marry. I will admit I was in shock. I really didn’t believe that I would see it in my lifetime and I am only 34. I expected that this would be the thing of future generations who were wiser and more learned than my own. So to see it happen was a total surprise to me. I look at Jim Obergefell who brought the case to the Supreme Court with admiration. His courage to take a stand and fight is awe inspiring.

              

I am thankful for this because as I have gotten older marriage is one of those things that I think I would consider. I spent my teens and 20s dismissing marriage as an archaic concept. Now I see it as something beautiful that exist as a symbol of love, not just a government contract. When the fight for marriage equality began it was before I came to terms with my sexuality and I remember looking at images of happy same-sex couples getting married and feeling a pang in my heart, and secretly wishing that was me one day.

I’m thankful for this because what it means beyond love. Yes love is important, and being in love is the reason you should get married, but there’s legal issues too, and marriage equality opened up a whole host of legal protections for same-sex couples. From things like being able to be by your dying partners side or being able to leave your pension to your partner in the event of your death. These are the things that we should have had a long time ago, but at least we have them now, and I’m grateful for that.

Rights and History

I just want to talk about rights and how we as the LGBT+ community deserves them. I look at the current state of LGBT+ rights and it makes me sick, for every stride that we make we have assholes like Donald Trump, Ted Cruz and the rest of their cronies who would like to see the strides we have taken away. Justice Scalia still whines about losing the marriage equality fight. It seems that everywhere we turn that someone wants to take our hard earned rights away. Why, because we love differently, or because we choose to be who we truly are? I look at the battle we fight as members of the LGBT+ community and I can’t help but see parallels to the civil rights movement of the 60s. With the black community of the 1960s it was court orders to integrate college campuses, for us it’s marriage equality, and even though we have a court order from the highest court in the land we are still fighting battles for something as simple as a marriage license. Frankly I’m tired of going to Huff Post and seeing Kim Davis’s face, I think her 15 minutes of bigoted fame has come and gone.

Then we can take a look at discrimination with the little things like equal protection under the law, equal opportunity employment, and housing rights. I mean we’re not asking for much just the same things that every heteronormative and cisnormative individual has. This shouldn’t be that hard, there’s no asterisk next to all men are created equal, there is no “but” in the civil right act. The fact that some people likes boys instead girls, girls instead of boys, or identifies as a gender different from the one assigned to them at birth should not make them any less of a human being. So why is it that in most cities I can still is be fired from my job or denied medical care? There is nothing about my sexuality that makes my skillset any different or my body any less functional.

Then let’s talk about the elephant in the room, cakes. Now I know I have said some things before about Christians and their businesses and what I think they can do with them, and there’s part of me that firmly believes what I say, however I don’t think we should be fighting this war over cake, flowers, or catering in general. I believe the concept of discriminating against someone because of their sexual orientation or gender identity is ridiculous. This discrimination in 2015 looks as ridiculous as discriminating against someone based on their race looked in the 1960s. How can we claim to be a progressive society; a melting pot of different cultures, ideas and beliefs yet we want to exclude one segment of the population just because they are different.

So as we come to the end of LGBT history month let’s also remember that this fight didn’t start with marriage equality. Anyone coming here from my Instagram (@ravenillusion) knows that I’ve been covering LGBT history month events there just to show some of the struggles and triumphs that have happened in the past. There are many pioneers that have come and gone that have fought for the rights that we have today so take some time to remember them, and look onward to the pioneers of the future.

Who will Stand for You?

The days of “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it” have long past, but it still feels like being a member of the LGBTQ community is something new. Especially if you listen to the right wing nut bags that want to run for President. The truth of the matter is that being gay have be around for millennia and it is not about to stop, so we as a culture need to fighting it and start embracing it. Now I know that for some people they feel that their religious beliefs prevent them from embracing the LGBTQ community and I have spoken about what we can do with those people. As the LBGTQ community stands up and fights for equality I am reminded of Pastor Martin Niemöller famous poem:

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

The fight for LGBTQ equality is just another is a long line of equality battles that have been fought in this country and it is time for everyone to take up arms in the battle, because you never know who is going to be the next group targeted to have their rights diminished.

Now I know this might sound counterintuitive from someone who wants anti-gay businesses to put up signs that say “no gays allowed.” I’m not advocating that we force everyone to fly a pride flag in their front lawns, what I am advocating is that every person that believes that all people are created equal stand up and fight. Open your mouth when you see discrimination, stand against companies that have poor records when it comes to LGBTQ issues, and finally get out and vote, it may only seem like one vote, but your vote is one in many and it makes a stand against hate, bigotry, and discrimination.

Martin Luther King Jr. said “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.” I have a similar dream to Mr. King, it just adds a few things like sexual preference and gender identity. If someone has to hate me I want them to do so because they think I’m an asshole, not because of who I choose to love.

Being gay is not a sin, nor is it a choice it is just who you are. Pride is not a dirty word, nor is it something just for the LGBTQ community. Pride is for everyone, because it is for everyone to take a stand when some someone’s rights are being diminished. The road to equality is a long one, and it will have many twist, and turns, but is a journey we all must take. It is however a journey that we should not take alone because just think when your time comes who will stand for you?